A Part Of Something Big

The desire to belong is innate and strong. Maslow ranks it as one of the five fundamental human needs in his 'hierarchy', and social scientists have confirmed that for those who commit suicide, the feeling of not belonging ranks highly as to their motivations in taking their own lives, especially among the young.

I couldn't help but think about the phenomenon of belongingness as my news feed was blowing up with pictures and posts today of throngs of people in the streets in cities across the country as part of the #womensmarch. What they were marching about, what united them (beyond being women and unhappy with the current president) I'm not sure, but there was a definitive and contagious sense of belonging and solidarity among those who were a part of it (from what I could surmise from the posts).

We do things to fit in, to belong. We change our customs, adjust our beliefs, attempt to downplay those characteristics that make us outliers, either consciously or unconsciously. We deny what we know in our heart of hearts to be true sometimes even in order to belong. We also self-censor. The theory of the "Spiral of Silence"  (developed by political scientist Elisabeth Noelle-Neumann in 1974) refers to the tendency of people to remain silent when they feel their views are in opposition to the majority view on a subject. At the heart of this is the strong fear of isolation from the majority for holding a contrary view.

Assimilation is not bad per se. The issue is when a people set apart trade in their calling--what they know to be right in accordance with divine decree and their unique place therein--to be like everyone else.

From its beginning, Israel was a theocracy. This is a hard concept for us to understand in modern times--that the King over Israel was God Himself, ruling from the Heavens and making His will and decrees known through the prophets. Over time, however, the Israelites were not satisfied with God ruling over them. They wanted a king "like all the nations, to rule us" (1 Sam 8:5). "There must be a king over us," they said; "we too must be like all the nations." And so they are given Saul, Israel's first king, to rule over them.

God had chosen Israel to be a nation set apart. But time and time again, we see them not being satisfied with what God has given them, whether it be manna to eat (Ex 16) or his kingship.
Time and time again, we see the strong desire to assimilate be the beginning of their undoing--whether it be inter-marrying (1 Kings 11:12) or worshipping idols (Ex 32).

The prophets were called to be outliers from the majority, and theirs was often a lonely calling. If not for God's assurance of their mission, many would most likely cripple under the weight of opposition to their oracles. I've often admired the prophets, in a kind of fascination, for having the strength of conviction in standing strong for what is true and carrying out what they are called to do, enduring loneliness, persecution, and isolation for the sake of doing God's will.

It is a fascination because in myself I have a strong desire to be liked, accepted, and to belong. It is a kind of special temptation for me. I have thin skin and am sensitive to what people think of me. I craft my image carefully and present myself in the best light. And yet most of my life I have found myself on the fringes, not really having a home or strong sense of belonging in any one group. I have my faith, what I know to be universally true, but for most of my life I have been trying to live it out on my own or only sparsely connected with other followers. I get lonely. Sometimes I just really, really want to be a part of something.

But I am not willing to do it at the expense of Truth. Because once you betray Truth, what else do you have? The culture does not deliver on its promises of fulfillment or lasting happiness. Corporations will let go even the most loyal 40 year veteran without a second look. Friends have been known to fall off when the going gets tough, fall asleep when you need them most (Mt 26:40). Family is thicker but even they are not everlasting. It takes a strong person of faith to walk the narrow path that leads to life, a gate through which few enter (Mt 7:13), for only those who persevere to the end will be saved (Mt 24:13). May the Lord protect us and guide us as we march forward, and keep us from all that would divert our steps from the Way of the pilgrims who who have gone before us.