Radical Authenticity

I'm not a good liar. I could probably count on my hand the number of lies I have told in my life; partly because I have such a horrible memory that I can't keep stories straight, and partly because it causes an inevitable amount of anxiety. I found it easier to just always vow to tell the truth to simplify my life (not to mention that lying is a vice and sin). 

There are very few TED talks I get a lot out of, but this one I came across was very good. 

The talk is by a man in recovery from drug addiction who went on to start a multi-million dollar healthcare software company by exercising the three principals he were told in recovery that were so important that if he didn't practice them on a daily basis he wouldn't live. These principals were:

Practice Rigorous Authenticity

Surrender The Outcome

Do Uncomfortable Work

He tells a couple stories of early on when he was getting clean and having to find a job of being tempted to lie to cover up the three year gap in his resume. But he remembered the first principal, took a deep breath in an interview, and told the truth to the manager at Sam Goody. To his surprise, rather than not getting the job, the manager asked, "so when can you start?"

Later on, in corporate America of all places, he was promoted eight times in eight years for living by that principal, because those above him knew they could trust him. 

He was severely tested after going out on his own with a business partner, lines of credit maxed out and 401ks emptied, when there was a glitch in their software which affected a patient and he found himself again in the position of being tempted to not disclose it. Their whole business hinged on a contract that would make or break them, and he didn't know how the client would respond to the disclosure. When he told them about the glitch and held his breath, the client laughed "When I get a call like this, it's usually for 20,000 patients, not one. Most people should tell me, but they don't. If anything, I'm more confident in you now because you told the truth."

Radical (rigorous) authenticity is a principal I try to live my life by. If someone is not authentic, I can smell it, and would rather not have anything to do with the person--it's not worth my time. I had a friend years ago who dated a compulsive liar. His lies were so intricate it was like he was living a double life. I don't know how people like this live. It sounds exhausting, not to mention pathological.

These are good principals to live by in our lives of faith, I think. Be authentic--act around others as if you were alone, and alone as if you were around others. As King David said to the Lord God, "Cleanse me from my hidden faults" (Ps 19:12). Surrender the outcome, as St. Alphonsus, St. Francis de Sales, and Fr. Jean Pierre de Caussade and others teach in their writings--"cast your cares on Him, for He cares for you" (1 Pt 5:7). And finally, do the uncomfortable work you are called to do, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks behind is fit for the kingdom of God" (Lk 9:62). 

For this addict, practicing these principals daily meant he would live. For us as Christians, putting the commands and words of our Lord Jesus Christ into practice means we will die, but find our life beyond this world. It is the radical paradox of the Christian life and the martyr's calling. When everything is on the line, it's apostasy which is the death of the soul we should fear. 

But we can't live it if we are not authentic, first and foremost. God knows our inner hearts, and though we don't have to wear our hearts on our sleeve to others, we can bear ourselves to Him in secret so that He might remake us into who He wants us to be for His purposes.