"Be Who You Are And Be That Well"

 

The other day I was chatting with a buddy in the Air Force as he was at the mechanic; I asked him what kind of car he had taken in--it was a 2009 Toyota Prius with 220,000 miles. Thankfully, he said, it was just some loose wires that had caused the "triangle of death" error, and a few hundred dollars later he was back on the road. I asked him if he ever got crap from other servicemen about driving a Prius, and he said yeah, but he's laughing all the way to the bank now with gas prices what they are. 

I'm slightly self conscious about driving my own Prius because of what it represents in the mind of most of the people I associate with, but thankfully not enough not to drive one. It is really the best, most reliable car I have ever owned, and I would buy another one hands down. When it first came out twenty years ago, it was probably the most over-engineered car on the market (in a good way). 

I have never bought a new car, and bought this one used with 50k miles on the clock for $9k. Seven years and almost 100k miles later, I have had to do nothing to it beyond regular oil and filter changes, some spark plugs, and a coolant flush (I also sprung for an AC freon recharge recently). I bought it because I cannot afford a new car, and I needed something with minimal operating and maintenance costs (it consistently ranks as the car with the lowest cost-of-ownership in Consumer Reports). I have hauled countless tons of furniture, as it's a hatchback and the seats go flat with a lot of usable cargo room. We even took it up for vacation this week, all five of us and all our stuff (I realize if we had more than 3 kids we would be out of luck here, and feel for the big families with vans getting hit at the pump). We got 49 miles per gallon on the way up. I plan to take it to 300k miles (I have seen people selling similar models on Craigslist with 230k+ miles on it, many with the original traction battery).

Because the engine only runs half the time (it's a hybrid), engine wear is minimal. As a result, the continuously variable transmission is never strained and rarely experiences failure (which can be costly for most cars), which my mechanic attests to. If you get 200k out of your traction battery (the main hybrid battery) and it goes for some reason, it can typically be swapped out for around $1,500 and run for another 150k miles at least. There have been Prius taxis that have over 300k, and one with over 620k miles on the original battery.

Driving it is an extremely pleasant experience. It cuts through the air and coasts effortlessly, due to the aerodynamic design. In traffic, the engine cuts off and it operates in EV mode, so the engine is not idling and it is quiet. I find an unexpected effect of this is I'm not as pissed off in traffic. 

We also have a Ford Explorer, but we've been driving it less because of $5/gal gas prices and driving the Prius more. Overall, I'm completely happy with the car and find my overall costs minimal. The only problem is, I'm "that guy that drives a Prius."

Most of my decisions (car purchases, housing, clothes, etc) are pragmatic. Thankfully my dad has a tendency not to care what people think and raised me the same, which sometimes bites me but overall I'm thankfully for. Part of the reason I don't get published much is my writing doesn't fit neatly into a pre-defined box. Which is fine, and why I mostly blog here, where I can think what I think and write what I want. 

But there's this curious thing in delineated "liberal vs. conservative" camps. If you're either, you wear your stripes in ways people can see. I have no issues with people in construction or rural areas who drive trucks and 4x4s where it's a necessary item. A lot of trucks can go high mileage too, but you pay a premium for it. I wouldn't want to be towing a flatbed or pulling someone out of a ditch with a Prius. They serve their purpose. 

But for many people, the truck is an image thing. Same for the Prius and other "environmental-type" cars. Leonardo DiCaprio was virtual signaling years ago with his Prius in Hollywood when it came out, trying to get everyone to drive one. South Park did a great spoof on this tendency for liberals to pollute with their "smug" while driving their Toyota "Pious." People do this with their Trump and Biden/Co-Exist bumper stickers too. It's human nature. I do have an American flag on the front of my car, maybe in a futile effort to keep trucks from running me off the road when they see me from behind. I still suffer from the "image problem," but it's a dumb problem to have, to be honest. Like I said, I can't afford to drive a truck anyway, and my choice to buy this car was based not on the image, but the practicalities. 

We do this with the faith as well. There's an unconscious tendency to fit in, and so new trads will see veiling and wearing home made dresses as pre-requisites for worship, while liberal Catholics will find no shortage of opportunities to extol the virtues of tolerance and ecumenism. All fine, if that's what you feel drawn to. I guess I'm a free-thinking "liberal" in the classical sense, with a "conservative" foundation for moral truths and absolutes. What I don't like is "you should drive/wear/support x, y, z because you are this-or-that." Social mores are strong forces, but they are not absolutes.

Bill Maher (a non-religious liberal, in the classic sense) had a great monologue being tired of the gay/trans insanity. This is a guy who *should* support these things as a "progressive," but what I appreciated in his bit was he didn't feel the need to--he's going to think for himself and say what he wants, whether people like it or not. Dave Chappelle did the same. Joe Rogan is the opposite on the gay/trans stuff (he fully supports it), but is pro 2A and a full-blooded American in other ways (I wish he wasn't so religiously ignorant, but we all have to start somewhere).

This is what I found so moving in the Desire of the Everlasting Hills video (which my friend Paul Darrow was featured in)--those with SSA who came to the realization that they did not want to be defined by the uni-lateral label of being "gay." They realized their essence as a man or woman went beyond a one-dimensional sexuality that was boxed up by other people, and that God had made them for more. They came to accept "who they were," but not in the defined narrative that the LGBT lobby expects of those who "come out." They came out as people who desired wholeness, not sexual platitudes, and embraced chastity as a viable option that did not diminish their personhood and was accordance with God's plan for human sexuality. It's not always an easy thing to navigate--becoming whole--because of these social pressures we have to conform. Being put in a box make it easier for people to either side with a person or dismiss them, and it doesn't require much thought or consideration (which is why we prefer to box people up). 

I don't like being told what I can and can't do, what I can wear or drive or think or believe. If I believe or assent to doctrine, it's because I have deferred to that authority willingly. If I worship in a traditional manner, it's because it is fitting, not because I'm trying to fit in. I'm not trying to score points with anyone, even while 95% of my friends are conservatives (they still love me despite my car). I find tiresome conservative and liberal talking points alike, if that's all you have in your conversation repertoire and lack the confidence to consider other points of view. 

It's ok to have these points of view, but you should own them. If you love trucks, then drive a truck. If you want to save the planet or whatever and you feel that would impede that mission, drive something else. If you want to veil and pray from a missal, do it. If you don't, can't, or prefer some other way, do that. It's okay. It's a false, external dichotomy, these window dressings. What's important for Catholics is that we follow Christ, assent to the Church (his Bride), and live in charity. Big stones first....then you can fill the jar in with the pebbles. Or as St. Francis de Sales said, "be who you are, and be that well."